Old habits . . .

. . . don’t always die hard. Sometimes, like in a bad horror movie, they keeping coming back.

I’ve had some things happen both professionally and personally that brought to my attention how I’m not quite where I want to be. Life is funny that way. It is also quite humbling. It is a solid reminder to me that I can’t do this stuff on my own. I need help. For me personally, I need Jesus. It’s wild because these triggers probably haven’t been activated in years. So, I coast along, thinking those things are in the past, right, that they’re handled.

Not so fast!

Habits are powerful. I highly recommend Charles Duhigg‘s The Power of Habit. It’s pretty easy to think of habits as smoking/drinking, exercise, etc., but that’s not all. We have habits of responding, too. In my profession, I try to help people with breaking habits, creating new ones, and other things, too. But, just as our teachers don’t know everything, we counselors don’t have all of the issues resolved in our own lives, either!

Here are some things I noticed with these experiences that I hope maybe helps some of you if you notice old habits creeping back into your lives.

For these old, dead habits to resurface or resurrect, it just took the right environment to grow. I’ve had some stressful, worrisome things happening in different areas. These aren’t my typical stressors. I felt vulnerable. When we’re vulnerable, we’re more susceptible to not responding optimally. It really helps to be aware of your potential triggers. If you’re unsure, ask a trusted loved one.

When the old habits resurface, so did old negative thought patterns. I noticed a negative, running dialog of old thoughts. The good news is I noticed these rather quickly. I had a choice to make: give in or dig in. As soon as you recognize these thoughts, use all the skills you have (see posts if you need some help) to combat them. Thoughts aren’t facts. When negative thoughts find their way into your awareness, look for the evidence. If you can’t find any, move on.

I had a choice to make: Give in or dig in.

drjasonnewcomb.com

Don’t be surprised when old habits are resurrected. It happens. Do not beat yourself up. Don’t give into the negative thoughts. You’re not a failure; you’re not worthless. You have value. Give yourself the love, compassion, and grace that you would give to a valued loved one. Your work in getting through these times may very well lead you to helping someone else in a very similar situation. Have a plan. Stay grounded using grounding techniques. Use deep breathing. Take up hiking, yoga, or nature photography. Contact a friend. Have a mantra; use affirmations. Don’t think you’ve overcome it; otherwise, you might find yourself in a similar situation as I . . . humbled. Operating with pride is a good way to find yourself humbled. Trust me on this!

These events reminded me I still have a long way to go. When you slip up, don’t beat yourself up. Dig in and fight those old habits, and maybe they will, indeed, die hard.

#habits #behavior #change #Jesus #thoughts #negativity #responses #digin #dontgivein #selfgrace