When Answered Prayers Don’t Go the Way You Wanted

I really struggle knowing the will of God. I’m yet to have an audible experience that some experience. I always, always picture the scene in Bruce Almighty when Bruce asks God for a sign. I feel that way sometimes. I like to think that I need a clear, smack-me-in-the-forehead direction. I have come to understand after sleeping, particularly early mornings, that I wake up with insights I credit to God.

I’m going to tell the truth here; however, I’m going to leave some key details. It’s important to me not to create a side versus side thing. I don’t want people on my side. I’ve had some difficult conversations lately with a friend. Intense, heated, passionate. I admittedly did not conduct myself appropriately in one, and I’m super grateful I got to apologize. I was met with grace in that apology, and I appreciate that.

I have been praying about a particular issue, hoping for a different outcome. That did not happen. In other words, I did not get my way. Folks, it is so tough to live out the Gospel. When we struggle with this, really give credit to Jesus for His perfection, to walk and talk on this Earth without sin and to die so that we can have a bridge back to God. Thank You, Jesus!

I had a sinking feeling things would not go the way I wanted. I immediately knew part of what I was experiencing was grief due to perceived losses (relationships possibly, hopes and dreams, etc.). I knew part of it was transition. I knew part of it was uncertainty. Not only have these things been happening, but also my family and I have been going through some other difficult and stressful times. I don’t know how things go for you, but when I hit a down spot, sometimes, it feels like things pile on or add to whatever it is I’m going through. I know my buttons, and they are being pressed!

Here are some things I have done to try to make the best decision possible.

• Pray. Never, ever underestimate the power of prayer. It helps to know how God typically responds to you. I would add to be open to other ways as well.
• Seek prayer. Jesus had close confidants; we should, too. It helps being open and honest. It helps having people on your side who love Jesus and pursue Him. In seeking prayer, this does not need to be in the churchy, gossipy way. Reach out to people you feel led to, that you trust, that you know love Jesus.
• Share those insights. These can lead to difficult conversations. Try to speak the truth in love. If you fail, apologize. Recognize things may not go how you want.
• Talk this out with those confidants. This should be your spouse if applicable as well as perhaps those you sought their prayers. Follow God’s lead here. If someone pops in your mind, give it a go.
• Seek professional help. This could be a therapist. This could be a pastor.

I have found these things helpful. These are not the only things you can do. In fact, if you have ideas, please share them. Even in doing all of these things, recognize that things may not go the way you want. The weight of the events recently put me on my knees. I do not do this nearly enough! I felt the weight, and I sought time with Jesus. As I did this, my mind blanked. My eyes watered. Then, something incredible happened. I found myself praising God and giving thanks. God is good no matter our circumstances, our feelings, or whether we get our way or not.

Give thanks in everything.

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