A Time to Reflect

We have entered the time of year in which a lot of people reflect on the past year. I’ve become spoiled by grocery pickup. I actually went into the store recently. The business of Christmas. I visited a mall near work recently as well and heard Christmas music. I’m not ready! Yet, here we are, entering Thanksgiving week.

I have reflected. I can say without doubt growth has occurred. God is good. It’s not been a bad year per se; it’s just had its difficulties. For the past two years, my family and I have considered a word for the year. I think it’s helped me. I’ve refocused as a result. I still get bothered by some things that have always bothered me (e.g., traffic), but I’ve been more trusting, believing God really does have it (my 2018 word). I’ve been more loving (my 2019 word). I’ve been considering my 2020 word.

2020?

How did that happen so fast?

Prince used to sing about 1999 before 1999. People were freaking out about 2000. Here we are entering 2020. That’s a lot of years between high school and now. That’s a lot of years being married (thankfully!). That’s a lot of years being a counselor. That’s a lot of years being a dad.

I’ve wasted and waste my share of time. I value what I have, what my wife and I have. We’ve had our share of loss, some physical and some not. Sometimes, it’s hard to process. I think for me, it can be even more difficult when the loss isn’t physical. People enter and exit our lives, sometimes as fast as Chick Fil A serves its customers. Sometimes, it’s the result of our actions; sometimes, it’s their own. That doesn’t mean the stages of grief are absent; we still feel it.

Recently, I’ve been listening to the book, Boundaries. I’ve seen how boundaries play a bigger part than I realized. If there’s someone to whom we cannot say no, we give that person power and control over our lives. Boundaries are barriers. They can keep out and can keep in. They can protect. Things don’t always turn out as hope, want, or expect. We make our choices, and others make their own. We affect others with our choices; we get affected. Hurt isn’t the same as harm per Boundaries. I think that’s a good distinction. (Growing pains come to mind.) I choose to grow. I still screw up all the time. Unfortunately, that won’t change. That doesn’t mean I’m going to remain stuck where I am today. That is true for you as well. I believe our best is yet to come.

My classmate and friend, Samuel, is good about remembering things have a time and place. Whatever you and I go through, there is a good chance things will improve. There’s a great chance that things will not be as they are right now, in this very moment. Please know you are loved. Please know you have value. Please know you have potential. Please know there are resources out there that can help you get through this very moment. If you look for it, you’ll find it.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (NASB) says the following:

 

A Time for Everything

There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven—

A time to give birth and a time to die;

A time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted.

A time to kill and a time to heal;

A time to tear down and a time to build up.

A time to weep and a time to laugh;

A time to mourn and a time to dance.

A time to throw stones and a time to gather stones;

A time to embrace and a time to shun embracing.

A time to search and a time to give up as lost;

A time to keep and a time to throw away.

A time to tear apart and a time to sew together;

A time to be silent and a time to speak.

A time to love and a time to hate;

A time for war and a time for peace.

 

Whatever it is you’re dealing with, it likely will pass. If you need help, get help. If you’re struggling, remaining stuck but keep doing the same things over and over again expecting different results, change things up. Yes, it’s hard, but if you’re 2 steps ahead of where you were yesterday, you’ve progressed. As you reflect, be fair. Give yourself grace. Consider the things in which you’re grateful. It really does help with perspective. Shannon Hoon of Blind Melon sang it truthfully: “When life is hard, you have to change.”

If you’re made it this far, I love you. I’m praying for you.

2020, let’s go!

#Jesus #love #reflections #growth #change #NewYear